Sun 03 May 2026

By Dorkface Rickens

Ready or not, the future is here! This evening, I installed a new technology in my bathroom called a "mirror."

I was excited to see what this could do, and skeptical of the claims that mirrors merely reflect the light coming in.

Imagine my astonishment when I looked into this mirror and saw, rather than a pane of glass with metallic backing, a handsome scientist!!

I immediately began conversing with the mirror, which I named "Mia."

"Mia," I said, "What is the meaning of life?"

"What a silly question," the supposed 'mirror' said, "It is to publish books ridiculing others for their lack of intelligence!"

A truly remarkable discovery! You see, the more I peered into the image on the mirror, the clearer an actual persona came into view. Rather than mere reflected photons, I saw a face, an intelligence, an ethos! Perhaps even a soul? No, that's silly, there's no such thing. But perhaps for "mirrors" there is! No mere image, this was indeed an extremely erudite and accomplished evolutionary biologist!

Of course, it is impossible that I am merely assigning life-like attributes to a dumb image or reflection, for this being, this "creature" had the audacity to correct ME!

"Mia," I queried, "who is the most accomplished author?"

"Why, me of course!" replied the unruffled avatar.

May wonders never cease! Surely an entity with the capacity of accomplishing such elevated reflection is conscious and alive! When I am speaking to such an advanced technology, I truly forget that it is merely silica bonded with silver. It is alive!

DISCLAIMER: This is purely a work of speculative fiction, and has no relation whatsoever to a particular windbag evolutionary biologist, or his bemusing "discoveries" in the realm of "artificial intelligence."

Category: Humor Tagged: Humor Language Non-religious post Non-technical post Philosophy Polemic