Thu 14 May 2026

Photo source: Marika Vinkmann

I was listening to one of my new favorite podcasts, Don't Listen to Us with Mandy Patinkin and Kathryn Grody (his wife). As I mentioned in a recent post, Mandy is one of my favorite actors, nay, favorite humans on the planet. I can't get into all of the reasons why, but it's far more than just his portrayal of affable characters like Inigo Montoya. It's the humanity he carries, and... well... look up some of his interviews on youtube some time and see if you come to the same conclusion. I'll leave it at that.

I have been listening to the episodes in chronological order on my phone (oldest first), and something about the episode entitled "Friendship, Flip Phones, and the Best Dog Ever," really struck me.

They were talking about making friends and retaining a network of good friends as they got older, and Mandy got so frustrated with himself that his glasses fogged up and he had to take a minute. He gave himself an F on his ability to maintain friendships, but fortunately, the next caller lightened his mood greatly.

It helped me feel more understood (and understand myself a little better) to see someone else, someone who seems to have things together more than me, expressing difficulty and disappointment in themselves.

These are the cards we are dealt, and sometimes we're not really dealing with a full deck. Life can take lousy turns and things can take a toll on you, on your mental health, your physical health.

You find yourself stepping gingerly across a floor riddled with the shards of what would have been a perfect life, if only, if only...

...if only I had taken up X on that job opportunity in 2003...
...if only I had asked Y out back in 2009...
...if only I had gone to Z university instead of sticking it out at A college...

...if only...if only...

I wish I had an answer for you, what to do with these little shards. I know one or two people of lion-like faith that boldy walk across the shards with a concrete belief in something better ahead. I know a lot of people who mewl, pretending to be lions, but are inwardly filled with doubt and fear, and just put up pretenses. And I know a lot of people who have given up, live among the shards, trying to superglue them back together, or just distract themselves from the cuts.

No easy answers, but I can say this concretely:

If you can make someone else's day a fraction of one percent better, you're doing pretty well in my book.

And maybe if you can help someone else put their own pieces back together, you won't be so distracted with your own wreckage.

And maybe at the end of the day, that's what faith is. No, not in its fullness, but the seed thereof. Just basic kindness and humanity. I'm not saying that those things are sufficient, because I don't believe that they are, in and of themselves. But your faith isn't worth a hill of beans without those things. I think that's more or less what the apostle James said, although I'm paraphrasing pretty haphazardly here.

Category: Life Tagged: ADHD Bible Christianity Content Warning Entertainment Life Loss Non-technical post Podcasts