Gratitude Day 3: Cats!!
Thu 03 September 2026
Ok, seriously forget that supposed rule about the internet being for, uh, "spicy media." Forget that exploitative nonsense. Seriously. Call me a prude, I don't give a rip.
The Internet is for CATS. I sense that Vint Cerf, Bill Joy, Kirk McCusick, Al Gore, and the other parents of the Internet all had some kind of otherworldly awareness of the immense importance of the task before them.
DARPA, SchmARPA.
Military, Schmilitary.
Research, Schmeesearch.
THE INTERNET IS FOR CATS.
Given that the Internet was made for cat-related media, and given the fact that basically the entire human race is enslaved to the affections of these four-footed princes and princesses, I feel I have to ask myself WHY?
Why are cats so bloody fascinating? Why do we keep, I mean, serve them?
I wasn't a cat person growing up. I was a dog person. I got my first dog when I was in Middle School, a beautiful smallish "Ski Border" dog. He was incredibly loyal, meek, and sweet-natured. I had him for twelve years, and losing him absolutely wrecked me. I got my second dog just a few years later, a Cocker Spaniel with so little brainpower he must have been eligible to run for President of the United States. He kind of adopted us, and I had him for several years. Sadly, he passed away the same year my first dog did, just a few months later. Although I wasn't as close to him, he was a very sweet creature (if a little demented), and it hurt to lose him.
Except for those with unfortunate trauma, most people love dogs. With the exception of Chihuahuas (which are pretty much hellspawn), and perhaps Siberian Huskies (which are beautiful dogs, but such drama queens that they must be related to the Kardashians or Jenners, or whomever it is that silly, vapid people follow on instag0rm), dogs are almost always instantly likeable, and extremely eager to please.
But why is it that cats hold people's fascination so much more than dogs?
Among the four cats and two dogs I've had, the closest, sweetest, most heartfelt relationship I had with a dog doesn't really match the same with a cat. Now, to be sure, I do feel like the average human-canine emotional connection/relationship is probably deeper than the average human-feline. Cats can be standoffish, they can be honestly pretty dickish!
But when a cat finally deigns to actually choose and love a human, rather than just be served by and companionate with them, it's really something.
Calvin and Hobbes were my first cats, although it was actually my aunt's cats a decade earlier that really introduced me to cats, and helped this awkward dog person understand them, at least a little bit. Honestly, understanding cats isn't all that easy. They're much more instinctive and much less eager than dogs, and I think this is a large part of why some people mistakenly dislike cats. I wouldn't say I really had a relationship with those two cats, but I enjoyed being around them for the year I was there, and their personalities and antics were very fun to observe.
But when I finally got my own pair of kitties, I got to really observe cat behavior and learn what it meant to be a cat dad.
Calvin was a very social cat. He wanted to be petted if the other cat was being pet. He was a pretty big tan-and-white cat (well, not remotely Maine Coon big, but big), active, and outgoing. Hobbes, on the other hand, was... something else. We'll get to him in a bit.
I got Calvin and Hobbes in 2007. When Hobbes finally passed in 2023 (which I wrote about a great deal on this blog), I was catless for exactly one year, and then adopted Mira.
I honestly expected Mira to be a lot like Calvin or Hobbes, but she absolutely isn't. She's shy, withdrawing, and particular. I used to call her "my little Egyptian Princess" because of how picky she was about being held, and how she avoided being picked up and liked to hide under beds and couches. But more recently, I came to realize she actually has some significant trauma from her previous life. She's incredibly fearful, and when I finally understood that, it really broke my heart, and changed my attitude towards her. Now, I crouch more, entreat her rather than trying to find her, and find ways to define a safe space where she can come and get some affection without feeling cornered. Poor thing is really quite a fearful wallflower, but she's my little wallflower. 😻
Then, just a little over a month ago, I adopted Sunny, who's a sweet little ginger tabby kitten who moonlights as an Agent of Chaos. He is the most energetic cat I have ever seen, and he loves to run around, play, bite fingers and toes, and harrass his big sister. He's sweet, absolutely darling, but also a little cray-cray. Peak Ginger Tabby energy.
So, back to Hobbes. I promised I would get back to him.
Hobbes was a beautiful, deep-orange ginger tabby with amazing, soulful green eyes.
Selfishly, I had hoped that Mira would somehow be a replacement for Hobbes, but honestly, there is no replacement. Don't get me wrong, I dearly love both my cats and am incredibly thankful for them. But that ache, that ache...
It ain't going away.
That firey ginger lad is going to be a part of my soul for eternity. There's no replacing him.
From the moment I met him, that little guy was sitting on my lap and purring like he was trying to generate electricity for the entire neighborhood. Not the loudest purr, but extremely enthusiastic.
I never felt so loved by an animal. He always greeted me at the door, and if I slipped by him and went into the house, he would find me and maul me with affection. There was simply no escape, not that you would want one.
That cat LOVED, you must understand.
So, why CATS? Why are cats seemingly the locus of the entire Internet? Why not dogs? Alpacas? Gerbils? Crocodiles?
I think, without intending to get actually metaphysical/spiritual, cats have human souls. Or at least, they're very human-like. Indeed, I honestly think cats are more human-like than dogs.
Now, dear dog-friends/parents, please don't get in a huff. From what I have seen, in many cases, dogs are the best of us. They are arguably better than humans. Dogs can be jerks, too, but by and large, they are so eager to please, and very lovely.
But I think cats, having the ability to reject humans, requiring appeals, coaxing, and patience to form relationships with, represent something that humans can't resist:
A challenge.
A risk (of rejection).
A form of otherworldly beauty and an almost completely unknowable mind.
Cats are.... aliens?!?
They are alien to us. They are Uncanny Valley mammals, being similar enough to humans to be relatable, but different enough to be alluring. Both endearing and dangerous, capable of affection or attack. Unpredictable, unknowable (at least, until you learn to study them!)
I won't debate dogs' status of (hu)man's best friend. I think they honestly deserve it. Sweet-natured, loyal, they basically come out of the "box" ready to be your friend.
Cats remind us of the challenges of life, of existence. Of friendships that must be formed and nurtured, of the existence of beings both beautiful and otherworldly (and also, often times, amazingly DERP).
Cats are a fascinating reminder and clue that we are not alone in the universe, and whatever that unknowable OTHER is, we are invited to ponder that with our purring, lovely, and sometimes dickish four-footed companions.
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